Pink Sheets

Today, I'm taking a not-serious look at LVTI (UPDATE, it's here), which is trading on the Pink Sheets on an unsolicited basis. That means it's so far in the dark corners of the market that even the Pink Sheets says they don't know anything about it. No SEC filings. No market maker. But they have a creepy website featuring Carmen Electra (Homer woohoo!s) for dating with lots of pictures of beautiful people on it. 9 women and 1 man. Seems like an online dating website would probably get a lot more men than women...

...we find Lilian

female Cleveland Ohio, USA
I am lilian Carey,25,a mature, intelligent and fun loving Lady i'm from Marlone in wisconsin but was brought up by an uncle in the Cleveland Ohio after the death of my parents in a...

...and Joy

Newport Beach, Balboa Penn; looking to meet someone local. Am a down to earth person, yet professional and look to meet same. It's all about chemistry. True heart he...

If you try to read their FAQ, you get a bunch of Not Found web pages. But elsewhere they say that they charge you a $1 fee on your credit card to become a "verified member".

Ok, so their website doesn't tell me much, except that it seems odd. I mean, check out this chat room. Here are the first 10 names in the list:

Here's the latest press release.

Luvoo.com (PINKSHEETS: LVTI) a growing online dating company is pleased to report a 725 percent increase in subscribers since June 9th which is the day the company became publicly traded. During the first three weeks of being publicly traded, Luvoo.com has exceeded their targets and signed-on over 4,100 online dating subscribers.

Unlike many industries, Luvoo.com's financial model is based on month over month residual revenue from online dating subscribers. Currently, over 60 million Americans are single and could use online dating services. Numbers are greatly larger when factoring in the global online dating experience. Most of these services charge a monthly fee ranging from $12.99 to $29.95. Luvoo.com is FREE for a limited time only. Management projects accelerated residual revenue to follow there after.

Management anticipates a continued acceleration of subscribers and market share due to their national airing on "Access Hollywood," aggressive nationwide marketing, increased celebrity endorsements, affiliate business opportunities and patent pending concepts and technology such as "Verified Member," "Instant Notifier" and "The Luvoo Dating Card."

L Yvonne Vanhoek, President of Luvoo.com, stated, "This is an exciting time for our company. Our 3 week 725 percent increase in subscribers provides further proof of the huge online dating market. We will continue to aggressively market our company and provide unique online dating services for our subscribers."

Another news item, featured today by the way, is some pump-and-fill-in-the-blank promotion of various companies including one of my "favorites", Billy Martin's. Another one talks about a Russian oil business.

The promoter says, "OTC-ADVISORS.COM is a website that profiles stocks of interest. We are not licensed brokers. The information here is believed to be reliable, but not guaranteed to be accurate by OTC-ADVISORS." ...and you can take that to the bank!

They've signed up super-star Pauly Shore. And there were 1.62 million shares shorted (although they don't really show a short interest).

So here's their financial disclosure. It claims 2015 shareholders of record, but the footnote says that this is the 1996 public shareholders representing 7.2 million shares held in Cede & Co. There are 133 million shares outstanding! The share price actually was over a dollar at one point, which would mean the stock briefly had a market cap of $133 million. But don't worry, the price is still above 25 cents, which means a market cap of over $33 million. It had been hovering around 15 cents and far less going back to 2004 when they were "eDollars, Inc." They issued 30 million shares of restricted common and 5 million shares of preferred Class A stock. 500 million shares are authorized.

The company is now run by Doug Wall and Lewis G. Kurtz (who is a director).

Linda Espirito is also Secretary and a director (a certifified tax preparer since 1994).

Lourdes Van Hoek is a director and "is approved by the Bureau for Private Post Secondary and Vocational Education" as the director and head instructor for the Wag My Tail Pet Grooming School. Oddly enough, this has the exact same address as Luvoo. Hopefully they keep the dogs from peeing on the 3 servers. They do have a different phone number (I mean, how silly would that be to answer the phone "Wag my tail petting dating service, how may I help you?"). Also a certified tax preparer. She owns 15 million shares.

Stephen P. Lusko owns over 40 million shares.

Greg Neu owns 40 million shares.

Greg Tannous (notice the link to Wag My Tail) owns 15 million shares.

No accountant or auditor.

3 full-time employees.

In Oct 2004, they discontinued a former online dating software and started this new one. They had Russian programmers working on it. They basically have a window popup thingee that works even when they aren't logged into the website (as if that's a good thing). And members can print out and hand out cards to people they like who then log in to the service. They filed two provisional patents. 1,500 sq ft of office space at $1,500/month. 3 servers.

So with a market cap of over $33 million and 4,100 subscribers, that works out to about $8,000 per subscriber.

Do you realize that this could very well be the most overpriced stock in the entire world??? Not to mention the lack of financial statements. It reminds me of QBID, but without the flair. They should have called the dating service "Wag My Tail".

Wait, I think I can see into the future. I'm seeing a personal ad... "Hi, my name is Spot and I'm just itching to be wit choo. I like long walks and fire hydrants. I dislike postal workers and cats."

You know, I think I'll pass on this one.

signed,

Hunk-o-Muscle